Spam scam
Allegato al numero 60 della rubrica “Offline”

Questa è una parodia
un “finto” comunicato Associated Press
diffuso online nel luglio 2003

This is a mock Associated Press report
found online in July, 2003

Washington (AP) – Thursday, July 3, 2003

An e-mail spam operation that promised people an increase in penis size of 3 to 5 inches was ordered yesterday by a Federal Court to measure its customers’ penises in an effort to determine whether the company’s claims are fraudulent.

The Federal Trade Commission had accused the operation of using spam to sell penis enlargement herbal supplements for a $40 fee. The operation told consumers that their penises would increase vastly in length and girth, but many people who paid the fee reported only a mild tingling in the extremities, accompanied by a severe onset of diarrhea.

Consumers who paid for the enlargement pills from, but did not realize the promised gains in “marital satisfaction”, can file for a refund online by using a complaint form at, the FTC said. Consumers will be required to submit to measurement by a panel of experts assembled by the Commission, including Dr. Ruth Westheimer, Oprah Winfrey, and the guy who played the kindly old general practicioner on “Little House on the Prairie.”

Already measured a few

In July 2002, a court shut down the web site at the request of the FTC.

About 3,000 penises have already been measured, the FTC said.

The FTC said the man behind the operation, Romero “El Magnifico” De Los Membros, pleaded guilty in May to two criminal counts of public lewdness and faces up to 1 month in prison for each non-enlarged penis. A sentencing hearing is scheduled for September 5 in East St. Louis, Illinois.

Charles Jaffee, an attorney for the companies in the FTC civil case, said he had no immediate comment on the settlement, but remarked that his spouse was “more than satisfied” with “the new me.”

Ritorno a Offline numero 60

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